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POPSTAR 5: The Series/1

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Summary Edit

#101 - Floor 1: Produce, Boxing Gloves, and Auto Parts

Cast: Knight, Wads, Kirby, JK,

Places: Kirby's House, Knight's Car, Popstar 5 Grocery Store

Transcript Edit

{open to Knight sitting in a chair. A phone rings. Knight answers the phone. The screen splits to show Wads talking to him on the phone}

KNIGHT:{sighs} What is it, Wads?

WADS:{very fast and very loud} HEY, KNIGHT! GUESS WHAT!

KNIGHT: No. {slams the phone down}

{cue opening theme. Cut to Kirby's house. Kirby is opening the door to reveal Wads}

KIRBY: Hey, man!

WADS: Hey, Kirby. So, the show starts in an hour and a half?

KIRBY: Yeah.

WADS: Hey, man, can I get something to eat, or something? I'm kinda hungry.

KIRBY: Huh? Oh, yeah, sure. How do you eat without a mouth, anyway?

WADS: Don't ask.

{cut to Kirby's kitchen. Wads opens the fridge door}

WADS: Hey, Kirby!

KIRBY:{offscreen} What?

WADS: You don't have any food!

KIRBY:{walks onscreen} Really? Damn, we better go get some then.

WADS: Yeah, seriously.

{cut to a few minutes later. The screen is split between Kirby and Knight, both of which are talking on cellphones}

KNIGHT: Yeah, Kirby?

KIRBY:{childish} Kniiight, will you drive us to the stooore?

KNIGHT:{sighs} Alright, I will be there in a few minutes. {hangs up}

{cut to a few minutes later. The screen is no longer split. Kirby opens the door to let Knight in}

KNIGHT: You know, you two really need to think about getting driver's licenses.

KIRBY: Knight, you know that the instant we got cars, we'd hit some people and then crash into eachother.

KNIGHT: Hmm. True.

{pause}

KIRBY: ...Well, we better get going.

KNIGHT: Uhh, right.

{cut to inside Knight's car. Knight is driving, Kirby is in the passenger's seat, and Wads is in the back. Wads is drawing something}

WADS: Hey, Kirby, what do you think of this? {hands Kirby the drawing}

{cut to an image of the drawing. It is of Wads wearing what appears to be a beanie covered in roman candles, firecrackers, and rockets. All of the fuses are tied together, and are being lit by Kirby.}

KIRBY: That's... Uhh... Neat, I guess.

{cut back to the view of the car. Knight glances at the drawing}

KIRBY: But, wouldn't that-

KNIGHT:{whispering to Kirby} Just let him do it. It will be funny to watch him blow himself up.

KIRBY:{whispering to Knight} Yeah, you're right. Heh.

WADS: Huh? "But, wouldn't that" what?

KIRBY: Eh-Nothing, nothing!

WADS: ...Alright. Can I have my drawing back?

KIRBY: Sure. {hands Wads the drawing} Heh. So, are you serious about doing that, or...

WADS: Of course, I'm serious about it! Why wouldn't I be?

KIRBY: Oh, no reason-

KNIGHT:{exasperated} Oh, God.

KIRBY: What?

{Knight points to the camera. Cut to a view of the freeway from the front windshield. The roads are backed up for miles. Cut back to the view of the car}

KIRBY: ... {facepalms}

{cut back to the view of the road. After a few seconds, cut to a title card saying "Ten minutes later...". After a few seconds, cut back to the view of the road. It is exactly the same as before. After a few seconds, cut back to the view of the car.}

KIRBY: Could this get any worse?

WADS: NO, DON'T SAY THA-

{suddenly, a Jet Kirby randomly crashes through the front windshield, and into the back seat}

KNIGHT: What the hell?!

WADS: Oh, hey, JK!

JET KIRBY: Heyyy, Wads!

KIRBY: You know this guy?

WADS: Yeah, we were roommates back in college!

KIRBY: Oh yeah, I remember you.

WADS: So, what're you doing here?

JK: Well, I got caught in the traffic, and I decided to fly over it to see what the problem was. And then, I saw your car.

KNIGHT:{slightly annoyed} So you flew through the windshield?

JK: Well, I was aiming for the roof, but I missed. Where ya headed?

KIRBY: We were trying to go to the store to get some food.

JK: Oh, cool. Can I come with you guys?

KNIGHT: Well, you are already in the car, so I suppose you can.

WADS: Wait, what about your car?

JK: Don't worry, I drove it off the side of the road.

KIRBY: ...Seriously?

JK: Yeah, why not?

KIRBY: Uhh, nevermind.

KNIGHT: You know, we are not really gonna go anywhere with this traffic jam.

JK: Oh, hold on. {flies out of the car}

KIRBY: ...What-

{the car suddenly jerks. Judging from the view from the windows, the car is being lifted into the air}

KNIGHT: Huh?!

{cut to outside of Knight's car. JK can be seen flying and carrying the car over the traffic. After a few seconds, cut back to inside the car. Suddenly, it jerks}

KNIGHT: Agh! What the-

{cut back outside the car. It appears JK has dropped Knight's car on another one}

JK: ...Whoops. {grabs Knight's car, continues flying}

{cut back to inside the car}

KIRBY: Is JK always like this?

WADS: Always like what?

KNIGHT: Yes, yes he is.

KIRBY:{facepalm} Great.

{the car suddenly jerks again, and JK flies back into the car}

JK: Done.

KNIGHT: Excellent.

{cut to a few minutes later. JK is sitting beside Wads, and is looking at his drawing}

JK: Hey, that's cool, Wads. You gonna really make that?

WADS: Yeah, though I don't know where I'm gonna get all the fireworks.

'JK: I can help! I know a guy that owns a fireworks store on Popstar 7!

WADS: Really? Awesome!

JK: Yeah. Gonna be hard to get them past the teleportation inspectors, though.

WADS: I'll just get Kirby to swallow them.

KIRBY: What?! I refuse to be part of this!

JK: I'll do it.

WADS: What? But you can't inhale!

JK: Oh yeah? {spits out some kind of purple block, transforms into a normal Kirby}

WADS: What the hell is that?!

JK: What, this? {holds up the purple block} Synthesized copy ability.

WADS: A what?

KIRBY: Wads, you're taught about this in science class in ELEMENTARY SCHOOL! How could you not know this?

KNIGHT: Kirby, this is usually only taught to Kirbies. A Waddle Dee has virtually no use for that knowledge. A synthesized copy ability is a small block of food that contains genetically engineered DNA of enemies that create certain copy abilities. Each block is color-coded for the corresponding copy ability.

WADS: ...What?

KNIGHT: When a Kirby eats it, they get a copy ability.

WADS: Ohhhhh, I understand. Kinda.

{Kirby facepalms}

JK: Aaaaaanyway, how far are we from the store?

KNIGHT: We are almost there.

{cut to a few minutes later, in front of a building labeled "Popstar 5 Grocery Store". Knight's car drives onscreen, and parks in a parking space. The cast exits the car. Cut to a closeup of the four}

KNIGHT: Alright, we are finally here.

WADS: ...Uhh, Knight?

KNIGHT: What?

{Wads points to something offscreen. Zoom out to show that there is a teleportation booth beside them. (For those who don't know, a teleportation booth is a blue police box that will teleport anyone who enters it to the planet, or other booths on the same planet, of their choice. More information here.)}

{there is a pause. Knight facepalms, and Kirby starts slamming his head repeatedly against Knight's car}

KNIGHT: Kirby, please stop that.

KIRBY:{stops banging his head against the car} Sorry.

WADS: Let's just go inside the store, already.

KNIGHT: Agreed.

{cut to inside the store. The cast walks in, and each of them, aside from Knight, quickly grabs a shopping cart.

KNIGHT: You cannot possibly need a shopping cart for each of you.

KIRBY: I can't believe you've forgotten how much we Kirbies-

WADS: And Waddle Dees!

KIRBY: ...Kirbies and Waddle Dees eat! I mean, aren't you a Kirby yourself? Also, don't you at least want to get a little food?

KNIGHT: Ah, I apologize. I have forgotten. However, you have forgotten that my clone nature suppresses my inherent massive appetite. I am not hungr- {pauses, coughs} Agh! {voice becomes a bit more high-pitched} Ah, live a little, Knight!

JK: What's going on?

WADS: I think he's been possessed by MK again.

JK: Huh?

KNIGHT: How right you are, my marvelously mouthless mate! I have possessed Knight! {voice returns to Knight's normal pitch} Please, get out of my head, my lord. {voice becomes higher-pitched again. From now on, MK's lines will be separate from Knight's} Seriously, Knight. If you want me to respect you, you shouldn't act like so serious all the time. Go ahead, buy a lot of food! {voice becomes normal. Knight sighs} Alright, if you insist.

MK: I do!

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